Lifestyles of the Rich and Ninja

It is a known fact about Ninjas that they have a propensity to disappear entirely for, say, a month, and then reappear somewhere else.

If she had to explain this behaviour, Circusninja wouldn't really be much of a ninja. Telling you exactly where she is now wouldn't be very ninja-like, either.

Devotees of the art of ninjitsu will tell you that traditional Japanese ninjas move from place to place by dematerializing and traveling along one of the Earth's invisible spiritual meridians (pl: meridia?). American and Israeli ninjas use their cars.

Circus Ninja's car has a very clever and catchy name but it would be a violation of his Ninjitude to publish it on the internet. Let's just call him Downhill...um, Patrick.

Downhill Patrick had a full trunk and a semi-full backseat, and basically a fully inhabitable passenger seat, when he and Circus Ninja embarked on their latest de- and re-materialization adventure. Circus Ninja is now happily ensconced in a remarkably spartan apartment inside a building so luxurious she is almost embarrassed to tell you about it.

The apartment itself, however, is admirably outfitted to suit a Ninja's minimal needs. After three quick trips with a pushcart, Downhill Patrick was relieved of his cargo and Circus Ninja's new home was kitted out as follows: Kitchen stocked with necessary equipment; Mr. Coffee humming on the countertop; closet crammed with clothes mostly purchased in Israel; and living space consisting of an air mattress (thanks, Mom), a stack of really good books, two bar stools, a laptop, and a large empty space that honestly would be a suitable place to park Downhill Patrick except that the carpet is white.

Happy, happy ninja.

A final word about Downhill Patrick: for this trip, and all others prior, Downhill Patrick has had the following items in his trunk: bivvy tent; all-weather sleeping bag; case of bottled water; can opener and canned goods; aluminum space blanket; battery-operated speakers and CD player containing one mix CD of 80's rock songs; can of pepper spray (thanks, Grandma); L.L. Bean emergency kit (thanks, Sis); and bag of dried banana chips.

What this means for most people is that if they broke down somewhere off the beaten track, they would be able to hole up for the night and probably would not die. What it means for Circus Ninja is that if she broke down somewhere off the beaten track, she likes to think she might just stay there if the view was nice enough.